Saturday, December 22, 2012

Yes

Insecurities define a person whether they like it or not. The reason why people are so insecure is because they doubt their future. Will it turn their way? Or will it go out of hand? We sometimes forget that in order to learn, mistakes must be made. So throw away those sorrows, throw away those uncertainties and just say yes. Who knows, you might actually end up having the time of your life.

Until next time.
xx

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

XOXO

I've noticed that it's easier to hate than to love. Our minds have reached that stage of conforming where it is better to publicly showcase your mutual hate rather than indicate any signs of indelible love. Hate has become another tool used to belong and instead of it being condemned, it is being embraced. But let me help you understand my realisation. Love requires so much more energy mentally. This type of energy is harder to replenish than physical energy. When you are physically drained, a quick coffee, a good hearty meal and a nap would do the trick; however, when you are drained mentally, your conscious takes a blow so hard that it requires much more than drink and food to bring up those levels of energy. Love is tiring. It's a lot of hard work too, but remember this for me guys, love is rewarding. When you love well or are loved well, there's this phenomenon that courses through your veins. Love is what builds, not destroy. Love is what replenishes, never taking away. Albeit, these definitions of love are my interpretations only- it's not a black and white type of meaning. For example- if a boy and a girl loved, but broke up, it's safe to say that never seeing them and hating their very existence is easier than trying to love them as a friend, instead of as a partner. The amount of energy it takes to control and channel your love differently is indeed a task that would produce headaches. But say, the boy and girl succeed, this new love, this perhaps stronger version of love will guarantee them that they will both never be alone; that they will always have a friend when in need. Love requires control and patience. Love doesn't cost a cent, so to the person reading this, please remember to love; and to do it unconditionally.

Until next time.
xx

Friday, November 30, 2012

Whispers

You're so bad for me, I can't help it though. I'm so bloody addicted to you. How is it that you possess so much and try so little? I feel like a bird towards a new scent. You're so alluring, but I'm worried that I'll suffocate you, that I'll harm you. Oh couldn't you tell? I warned you, I'm damaged. But I will try, I really will. Controlling her is harder than you think, you see. But like every other day in my life, I will fight her don't you worry. My spirit is strong thanks to you, hopefully it's stronger than hers.

Until then.
xx

Monday, October 29, 2012

Vintage

You're such a familiar stranger. So close yet so far. You frustrate me so much but I can't bear to hurt you. I want to leave. I need to leave, but your cry for help is so loud, I can't ignore it. You're my sympathy case, my burden to carry. You know that I can't say no and I feel used and abused.
My cure is is your cure. Cure yourself please. I beg of you. If not for you, then for me. If I am that important to you, then set me free. Liberate me and allow me the senses of serenity I so dearly crave for.

It's you. You're my burden. My sweet, sweet burden.

Until next time.
xx

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Undesired

Sucks how your main flaw is your biggest flaw, not easy to change either.

Until then.
xx

Monday, October 1, 2012

Telltale Signs

I really love you. I do. But you need to stop with all this shit. The toxins you create around yourself. The way you embrace without thinking. We're growing tired of you, honey. We're always there to support you, please never forget that. But you're becoming too much to bear. I'm a bit sad to be honest. We both are. We feel a bit unappreciated. I thought you'd say thanks, or even at times I feel like I need a sorry from you. I miss the old you, I know you're somewhere in there. Even though the old you has gone, it's not like there's even a new you to appreciate. You've just literally become invisible. Your old self is gone, your new self never emerged. Where are you? I know you're stronger than this. Fight it. Fight him. I know you have the strength to be independent. If not, we're here to help you make those baby steps. Please stop letting others live your life for you. Please stop accepting to be spoon fed. Please come back to us. To me. I miss you, honey. I really do.

Until next time.
xx

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Scattered senseless

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i jhdc4edr vnjgdjbgdz bnfdsijh sbjklgeslbgjlbdlaug  eral

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FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU BIG TIME, ALL OF YOU. WORSTT I SWEAR JUST SHUT UP WILL YOU? jwiaeodlhfrut ulaxieorsfn;eoitgnfsijj;nitgo;erhtrethin; ohtleo hireoth fvgjswjjkbrffekbkjfhdbjalgbgabj;wfEIFEWEIOWFEEIO;E BJFBKJBJnnbjfeso bleruja nlf.reigkn rl;sljtimreo;t

Until then, motherfucker.
xx

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Remedy

Obviously it's all in my head. There's no way that so much can impact on such a little person. But it's true, I've succumbed to believe. And I wish, I really wish I didn't. Everything that occurs in our lives has several steps needed to be undertaken. We unconsciously take these steps without thinking of the consequences, without knowing where we're heading, without knowing the final result. WE are the people that make those choices, whether it's meticulously calculated; or randomly selected. WE are the ones that have to acknowledge our actions in the end.

It's horrible.

Knowing that you could have changed the past, knowing you were responsible for what has occurred and knowing that you had unconsciously said yes several steps of the way not realising how THAT final step can cause your world to fall apart. Don't worry about me though, as I've mentioned before, I've succumed to this mess. I know where I should stand YET I know where I actually stand. I am picking up those pieces. Just let me go at my own pace. Please.

Until next time.
xx

Friday, August 10, 2012

Queasy

My old habits are kicking back in. I need to let out. Soon.

Until then.
xx

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Punished

She searches all around her; that sense of feeling. Thinking, hoping, wishing, she walks on the path of the unknown. What will she find? She doesn't know. All she knows is that if she doesn't find it, her fear will come true. Numb.  It's an escape she tries to seek, an exit that she must find. Her feet lead her astray, she doesn't notice or feel the blisters on her soles. The sun beats down on her but she feels neither hot nor cold. She doesn't feel. So numb. She picks up a nearby sharp rock and cuts herself, to see if she could hurt. The blood trickles slowly from her wrist and form a small pool just near her blistered toes. Still, she feels so numb. No emotion can seep through her, no nerve within her body and soul has been touched. Her heart pulls within her, it knows she must feel and so gives her the gift of hate. She hates it. She hates what it's done to her. Hate contaminates her to her very inner core. She refuses this gift. Using the rock, she claws at her heart. She hates the rock, hates it's inefficiency. She hates herself, she is such a failure. She looks at her blisters and hates the very ground she treads on. She starts clawing at the ground, her nails dirtied by the soil, little cuts upon her fingers. Physically unable to stand any more self inflicted wounds, she lies down and watches the pool of blood beside her expand. Before she dies, she is granted the gift of curiosity.

'How can one emotion cause so much damage?'

Until next time.
xx

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Obituary

If I die young,
Bury me in satin,
Lay me down on a bed of roses.
Send me on a lake, at dawn.
Send me away with the words of a love song.
         Until then. xx

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Natural Instincts

We all crave for something during our lives. Whether it's power, knowledge or even love, we unconsciously search for it throughout our every waking moment. It is only when a significant incident occurs that opens our eyes to the real world. It is only when we realise we are about to lose something, that we acknowledge what we actually have. I've been trying my best to learn, to accomplish some sort of lesson, but it's so complicated, I end up being more confused than how I started. I try to always stand tall, to always lift my chin up and to always smile, but it just takes so much effort. So many people underestimate what they have. So many people don't realise how blessed they are, how gifted and how talented they can be. The show offs we notice, are we wrong to judge them? They have understood how valuable the things they possess are. Is it wrong to show it off to the world? We claim to be optimists, but I think the only lesson I've learnt is that we live in a double standard world. A world where it is okay to keep craving, as long as you do it with a smile. Real or fake? It's completely up to you. Until next time. xx

Monday, May 14, 2012

Message Received

How do you make an entrance? It should always start with a bang. Leaving that impression, leaving your invisible footprint in that person's mind will significantly mould your future's path. Whether it's love at first sight or hate at first sight, who cares? The first impression is always the most accurate way of judging a person's limits. What do I mean you ask? Have a try, then come back to me with that question again. After all, the best way of learning is through the process of implementing; is it not? Until then. xx